Today Sean and I celebrate 7 years of marriage. We have known each other for 11 years. Our dating life was rather difficult which is mainly my fault. Granted I'm not sure we would be doing so well had those first few years been easy. The phrase, "We've come a long way baby" comes to mind and is very true.
Within 7 years of marriage we have moved 6 times, had 3 children and our fourth to arrive in March, and survived two periods were work required us to live in different cities and different states.
Looking back it's easier to say it was a piece of cake because we see how far we have come and and much we still love and enjoy each other...yet....marriage is full of ups and downs, easy and hard times.
I believe the difference between marriages working and falling apart is the desire and effort put into those marriages. I was lucky enough to marry my best friend. He is the one I talk to about everything, the one who knows me better than I even know myself sometimes. And from what I know....the same is true in reverse.
We truly work as a team even if one must pull a little more weight than the other at times. We try very hard to not allow outside influences to cause us issue by discussing situations and realizing that first and foremost our relationship must always be at the top of the list.
We are far from perfect and far from having marriage figured out but we have realized that some things work better than others. We know that it takes work and you get into trouble when you are unwilling to do the work.
Some couples aren't so lucky. The quickly jump from relationship to relationship often times from marriage to marriage looking for something to fill a void which makes building a lasting relationship difficult.
I guess what I'm trying to say is that I'm truly blessed to have the husband I have and even though I might want to strangle him from time to time (as I'm sure he would love to do to me as well) I know I'm exactly where I am suppose to be.
Sean, I love you. Here's hoping the next 7 are as crazy and wonderful as the first 7.
Monday, January 26, 2009
Wednesday, January 7, 2009
so when does the whole "it gets easier" kick in?
Since I gave birth to twins I have been told, "It gets easier as they get older". Now while I'm sure that in some form that is true I am beginning to believe that from my perspective that statement is full of shit.
I love my kids...each and every one of them. Even if I can never seem to get their names right. I couldn't imagine my life without them, spend my days with them as my main concern and job.
However, since my girls turned 14 months old my life has been extremely interesting...even if only to me. Granted the craziness began the moment they were born. How to breastfeed two? How do change two? How to keep from going insane with two?
After Sean and I finally managed to find a way that allowed each of us to get some sleep and get the girls fed we were off and running...and rather smoothly I might add. That is until...
dun dun dun
They began to walk/run/climb. My girls became huge fans of hiding and even bigger fans of getting into any and everything that would make a mess.
Some of these rather scary yet fond memories include Finding and covering themselves and every inch of the floor in baby powder at 14 months, the girls climbing upon each others back to get over the baby gates at the young age of 17 months, at age 2 they began to team up on me.
This consisted of following me to the bathroom and while I'm attempting to pee one would run off and go straight for the door. While one entertained me the other would run outside and hide. Then they both began running outside and hiding. They of course did this naked on several occasions because for some reason I am still yet to understand they hated having to wear clothing, and took every opportunity to undress.
From this point they began to venture into the road on these escape adventures leading to a neighbor having to return them inside. How embarrassing to have to run for the door as your pulling your pants up because you just know that it's over the girls. And yet again, they were naked.
After this moment I installed alarms on all the doors so at least I was capable of keeping up. This alerted me immediately but amazingly 2 year olds are fast. They would take out the door running and I would find them hiding in a house that was still under construction across the street.
I spent many a day during their "toddler" stage crying. I just couldn't keep up and at every turn they were working together, against me.
This gave way to potty training which needless to say is one of the most difficult things I've ever done. There are days in which I still believe one of my daughters will be in middle school before she finally gets the full hang of it.
Now the girls spend their days trying to get into anything and everything they know they are not suppose to touch. Still playing in baby powder, still putting toothpaste on the floor and attempting to use it as glue (or at least that is what I'm guessing was the motive). They still climb cabinets to get into food they know they are forbidden to have and still hiding anything that might get them into trouble underneath anything they can find.
So if you spill your drink, the only logically answer is to cover it with dirty clothes and pray that mom doesn't find out....or if you find yourself unable to get to the bathroom in time to pee you should shove your stinky underwear underneath your brother's crib because mom would never look under there. My favorite thus far has been been the let's just throw it behind the tv.
At age 5 my girls on well on their way as kids. Yet it is more exhausting than when they were 4 days old and wanted nothing but to eat all the time and never sleep. I honestly believe it's getting harder and harder as they are getting older.
While so many seem to find the infant stage to be the craziest and most exhausting I have preferred it with all 3 of my kids. My little boy is still so loving and will just cuddle with me when it becomes bedtime yet, I still miss those days when he would just smile and wiggle vs. running and screaming.
It is amazing to watch them grow and become little people instead of these little helpless babies and yet there are days when the thought of them continuing to grow and become more independent is enough to send me searching for the nearest closet and a stiff drink which neither are possible currently.
Easier???? Not a chance, easy parenting is in the beginning when you do nothing but feed, change, and love. This whole allowing and teaching children to become self sufficient productive adults is exhausting....and my oldest kids are 5. The only thought I am left with is "God help me when they become teenagers."
I love my kids...each and every one of them. Even if I can never seem to get their names right. I couldn't imagine my life without them, spend my days with them as my main concern and job.
However, since my girls turned 14 months old my life has been extremely interesting...even if only to me. Granted the craziness began the moment they were born. How to breastfeed two? How do change two? How to keep from going insane with two?
After Sean and I finally managed to find a way that allowed each of us to get some sleep and get the girls fed we were off and running...and rather smoothly I might add. That is until...
dun dun dun
They began to walk/run/climb. My girls became huge fans of hiding and even bigger fans of getting into any and everything that would make a mess.
Some of these rather scary yet fond memories include Finding and covering themselves and every inch of the floor in baby powder at 14 months, the girls climbing upon each others back to get over the baby gates at the young age of 17 months, at age 2 they began to team up on me.
This consisted of following me to the bathroom and while I'm attempting to pee one would run off and go straight for the door. While one entertained me the other would run outside and hide. Then they both began running outside and hiding. They of course did this naked on several occasions because for some reason I am still yet to understand they hated having to wear clothing, and took every opportunity to undress.
From this point they began to venture into the road on these escape adventures leading to a neighbor having to return them inside. How embarrassing to have to run for the door as your pulling your pants up because you just know that it's over the girls. And yet again, they were naked.
After this moment I installed alarms on all the doors so at least I was capable of keeping up. This alerted me immediately but amazingly 2 year olds are fast. They would take out the door running and I would find them hiding in a house that was still under construction across the street.
I spent many a day during their "toddler" stage crying. I just couldn't keep up and at every turn they were working together, against me.
This gave way to potty training which needless to say is one of the most difficult things I've ever done. There are days in which I still believe one of my daughters will be in middle school before she finally gets the full hang of it.
Now the girls spend their days trying to get into anything and everything they know they are not suppose to touch. Still playing in baby powder, still putting toothpaste on the floor and attempting to use it as glue (or at least that is what I'm guessing was the motive). They still climb cabinets to get into food they know they are forbidden to have and still hiding anything that might get them into trouble underneath anything they can find.
So if you spill your drink, the only logically answer is to cover it with dirty clothes and pray that mom doesn't find out....or if you find yourself unable to get to the bathroom in time to pee you should shove your stinky underwear underneath your brother's crib because mom would never look under there. My favorite thus far has been been the let's just throw it behind the tv.
At age 5 my girls on well on their way as kids. Yet it is more exhausting than when they were 4 days old and wanted nothing but to eat all the time and never sleep. I honestly believe it's getting harder and harder as they are getting older.
While so many seem to find the infant stage to be the craziest and most exhausting I have preferred it with all 3 of my kids. My little boy is still so loving and will just cuddle with me when it becomes bedtime yet, I still miss those days when he would just smile and wiggle vs. running and screaming.
It is amazing to watch them grow and become little people instead of these little helpless babies and yet there are days when the thought of them continuing to grow and become more independent is enough to send me searching for the nearest closet and a stiff drink which neither are possible currently.
Easier???? Not a chance, easy parenting is in the beginning when you do nothing but feed, change, and love. This whole allowing and teaching children to become self sufficient productive adults is exhausting....and my oldest kids are 5. The only thought I am left with is "God help me when they become teenagers."
Monday, January 5, 2009
back to the norm
Today the girls returned to school after almost 2 weeks off. So to some degree life is returning to our norm. Mornings are busy with the girls rushing around getting ready for school and husband getting ready for work.
However, I'm surprised to say I miss my girls. I was very anxious with such a long break. Michael and I had worked out our routine while the girls were in school so to have that interrupted left me feeling somewhat out of control.
To my surprise the break was rather nice. No rushing in the evenings to get every thing in...no rush to stick to a strict bedtime. It was, shall we say, relaxed. While there were some hiccups along the way it was enjoyable.
So today, the house is much calmer, quieter, and lonelier.
While on the break I finished the baby's room. I painted it and then Sean and I put the crib together. Still several items needed and more decorating needed but if something should happen that baby boy arrives early...we are ready. That is if you don't count we are still in need of a name for our little guy.
It felt good to get the room ready and yet strange to think another little life will be entering our home before too long.
With each pregnancy I've been nervous. Constantly concerned that something might not be exactly right. How would we handle the change? The first, twins, I was mortified. How could I possibly care for two lives at once with no previous experience and no help. We lived 7 hours away from family and Sean was starting a new job.
With Michael I was just worried about how adding another life would change the family dynamic. We had perfected the family of 4 thing and while I was so excited to have my little boy I was worried about how I would deal with twins plus an infant.
This time, more than any other time, I'm worried about health. Thus far, we have been given no reason for concern other than extra heart tests which turned out fine. Still I have this nagging feeling that this one might prove to be more than I can handle. What if something goes wrong?
I should point out that I've worried about the health of the baby with each pregnancy so maybe the "more than any other time" is simply that I'm currently in the midst.
The next several months should prove to be very interesting with my ever growing belly/baby, girls full time in school and starting the soccer season soon, Michael a constant toddler, and momma trying to prep the house for another little life.
It's hectic, crazy, full of energy. So, yes, it's life back to normal for us which even though I miss my girls is nice because it means we are moving forward.
However, I'm surprised to say I miss my girls. I was very anxious with such a long break. Michael and I had worked out our routine while the girls were in school so to have that interrupted left me feeling somewhat out of control.
To my surprise the break was rather nice. No rushing in the evenings to get every thing in...no rush to stick to a strict bedtime. It was, shall we say, relaxed. While there were some hiccups along the way it was enjoyable.
So today, the house is much calmer, quieter, and lonelier.
While on the break I finished the baby's room. I painted it and then Sean and I put the crib together. Still several items needed and more decorating needed but if something should happen that baby boy arrives early...we are ready. That is if you don't count we are still in need of a name for our little guy.
It felt good to get the room ready and yet strange to think another little life will be entering our home before too long.
With each pregnancy I've been nervous. Constantly concerned that something might not be exactly right. How would we handle the change? The first, twins, I was mortified. How could I possibly care for two lives at once with no previous experience and no help. We lived 7 hours away from family and Sean was starting a new job.
With Michael I was just worried about how adding another life would change the family dynamic. We had perfected the family of 4 thing and while I was so excited to have my little boy I was worried about how I would deal with twins plus an infant.
This time, more than any other time, I'm worried about health. Thus far, we have been given no reason for concern other than extra heart tests which turned out fine. Still I have this nagging feeling that this one might prove to be more than I can handle. What if something goes wrong?
I should point out that I've worried about the health of the baby with each pregnancy so maybe the "more than any other time" is simply that I'm currently in the midst.
The next several months should prove to be very interesting with my ever growing belly/baby, girls full time in school and starting the soccer season soon, Michael a constant toddler, and momma trying to prep the house for another little life.
It's hectic, crazy, full of energy. So, yes, it's life back to normal for us which even though I miss my girls is nice because it means we are moving forward.
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